The Best Way To Be A Dad

 

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These 10 points about “the best way to be a father” were shared by Inspiring Content. They are so inspiring that we have reproduced them only with slight edits to make the information easier to consume.

Truly, quality parenting requires special education. As item 9 puts it, "Fatherhood is a hands-on approach".

But, in our view, these points are not only needed for the sake of parenting. Rather, every adult who did not have the privilege of quality parenting as a child, will also be able to recognize what he/she must have missed and be able to work on making up for them.

As our founder Desmond Nweke would say, “the only right way to blame your parents for not doing well is to do better than them in those areas you know they didn't do well”. Now, here we go: The best way to be a dad…

1. Be There

The biggest failure as a man is having a child and rejecting that child, abdicating your responsibility as a father, being quick to have sex and quicker to run away when pregnancy comes.

Too many children are hurting because of a father who is alive but has disowned them. It makes the child grow feeling unwanted and unloved. It dents the child's self esteem and some become adults with a constant feeling of rejection.

If you have a child, be there; no matter how bad things are between you and the mother of the child- be there; you owe it to your young one.

2. Tell Your Daughter That She Is Beautiful

The first man to compliment a girl should be her father, the first man to take note of her beauty should be her dad. A girl should grow up convinced she is beautiful and feeling like a king's princess that even when boys and men try to woo her saying she's beautiful, she responds by saying, "I know, dad has been telling me that for years".

Too many girls fall for preying men because they are desperately looking for affection. They have daddy issues and had no encounter with a male figure who genuinely loved them before the preying men noticed their boobs and hips; so they fall prey to men who use compliments and give attention as a carrot to lure them to a trap that leads to hurt.

3. Model Manhood To The Sons

A boy comes into the world as a naive student who will absorb what the male figures around him teach. He can be taught the right way to be a man or be misled. He learns how to treat females whether good or bad from the men around him. He should learn proper manhood from his father. The father should model how best to treat and respect females, how to love as a man, how to work, how to provide, and how to be a man of integrity. 

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4. Eat With Your Family

Food brings people together. One of the greatest shows of security to a child is when the dad makes time to share meals.

5. Be The Spiritual Leader

The father should be the High Priest. He should lead the child/children towards living a Godly life. He should be seen praying, reading God's word, living out a Godly life, loving. The child should be given a Godly foundation that will shape a stable future and the father should be seen submitting to the God who gave the child life and who makes parenthood possible.

6. Listen

A child with a father who loves to listen grows in confidence. When a child feels he/she can tell daddy anything, no battle will intimidate the child. Sometimes you don't have to say much, just sit back and pay attention. The first need of love is to be listened to, to be treated like how you feel and what you have to say is important.

7. Give Advice

A father should be there to offer counsel whether solicited or not. Children cry for direction. As a father, be involved in the process of the seeking of answers. Be open about your mistakes, your childhood, your lessons and your expectations of the child.

Give advice not as a dictator whose word is final lest you isolate yourself from the child because the child can do what you ask yet fear and despise you; but help the child understand why you are insisting on your way. Help the child understand your reasons, train your child to think through solutions; this way, he/ she will grow up with the self-sufficient capacity of making sound and wise decisions. 

8. Be Present

The father's presence should be felt. Too many fathers have left parenting to the wife. The best test of love is the giving of time. Do not fail this test.

9. Refrain From Throwing Money At The Problem

No matter how rich you are, fatherhood is not done by throwing money at issues. When your child complains of your absence, when problems arise, when dealing with your child becomes a handful and you feel you have no time; don't use money to silence or appease the child.

Fatherhood is a hands-on approach. It will not be easy but its fruits are sweet. Don't escape through your ATM. Material things can contain a child for a while, but soon the child will look around and see empty things but no love from Dad.

10. Show Up

Make daddy appearances; show up at your child's sports day, birthday, parent's day, graduation or any other special day. Make random visits to what your child cares alot about even if for a few minutes. Meet your child's friends briefly, let your child feel “daddy's loving eyes are watching over me”.

Courtesy: Inspiring Content